Depressed Eskimo Poetry

By: The Depressed Eskimo

Natural wonders all around
Snow piles endlessly on the ground
off to fish for tonight's meal
On my way I pass seal
My trusty dog leads way
I haven't haven't gotten laid in three years

You are the most beautiful woman
that I have ever seen
No one would understand us though
because you're really a penguin

It sure is cold
I'd love some company
I'm all alone
I could freeze my dick off trying to masturbate it's so cold

I am the king of my igloo
I do what I want when I want
I am my own boss
But I'd give it all up for a blowjob

The Snow Haiku:
Snow Snow Snow Snow Snow
Snow Snow Snow Snow Snow Snow Snow
Snow Snow Snow Snow Snow

I would trade all my whale blubber
For a nice, warm cup of anything

I loved that penguin
but you can't hump a penguin
Seals give good fin jobs though

The warmth of your breath
Is nothing compared to the warmth of your breasts

My shit comes out frozen

Dear lord
Thanks for all this cold stuff around me